Looking Out/Looking In

Looking Out/Looking In

Emotions CHAPTER TOPICS 4 What are Emotions? Influences on Emotional Expression Guidelines for Expressing Emotions Managing Difficult Emotions Looking Out/Looking In Thirteenth Edition

What Are Emotions? Physiological Factors Strong emotions are coupled with strong physiological factors Physical components of fear: Increased heart rate Rise in blood pressure Increase in adrenaline secretions Elevated blood sugar A slowing of the digestive system

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 2 What are Emotions? Nonverbal Reactions Feelings are often apparent by observable reactions Appearance Changes Blushing, sweating, etc Behavioral Changes

Facial expression Posture Gestures Different vocal tone or rate EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 3 What are Emotions? Cognitive Interpretations The mind plays an important role in determining emotional states The symptoms of fear discussed earlier are similar to those of excitement, joy and other emotions If you were to monitor someone having a strong emotional reaction, you would have a hard time

ascertaining which emotion the person was experiencing EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 4 What are Emotions? Verbal Expression Words can be required to discover the depth or intensity of the emotion At times we cant rely on perceptiveness to be sure a message is communicated Is a new acquaintance mistaking your friendlessness as a come-on? Is a lovers unenthusiastic response a sign of boredom with you, or something less personal?

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 5 Influences on Emotional Expression Personality There is a clear relationship between personality and the way we experience and express emotions Extroverts tend to report more positive emotions Neurotic individuals tend to report more negative emotions Personality doesnt have to govern your communication satisfaction EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING

6 Influences on Emotional Expression Culture A significant factor that influences emotional expression in different cultures is whether that culture is: Individualistic (United States and Canada) These cultures feel comfortable revealing their emotions to people with whom they are close Collectivistic (Japan and India) These cultures prize harmony and discourage expressions of negative emotions which may upset relationships

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 7 Influences on Emotional Expression Gender Biological sex is the best predictor of the ability to detect/interpret emotional expression Research suggests that there is some truth to the unexpressive male In one study, females were 10-15% more accurate in remembering emotional images People in close relationships are likely to experience/express more emotions than those who are not

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 8 Influences on Emotional Expression Social Conventions The unwritten rules of communication discourage the direct expression of emotion How many genuine emotional expressions do you or we see in daily life? Social rules even discourage too much expression of positive feelings Emotion Labor Managing or even suppressing emotions is both appropriate and necessary

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 9 Influences on Emotional Expression Fear of Self-Disclosure In a society that discourages the expression of emotions, revealing them can seem risky Emotional Contagion The process by which emotions are transferred from one person to another Is it possible to catch someones mood? Emotions become more infectious with prolonged contact EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING

10 Guidelines for Expressing Emotion There is not a universal rule for expression of emotion Personality, culture, gender, play a part The key is to express emotion constructively Think about a time when you expressed your emotion clearly, then wish you hadnt. Those who control their feelings and deny distress are more likely to get a host of ailments, including cancer and heart disease EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING

11 Guidelines for Expressing Emotion Recognize Your Feelings Beyond being aware, also try to identify Recognize the difference between feeling, talking and acting Expand your emotional vocabulary Share multiple feelings You might often express anger but overlook confusion, disappointment or frustration EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 12

Guidelines for Expressing Emotion Consider When and Where to Express Your Feelings Give yourself time to discover the gravity of the emotion before full expression Accept responsibility for your feelings Instead of saying: Youre making me angry! try Im getting angry. You hurt my feelings, say I feel hurt when you do that. EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 13 Guidelines for Expressing

Emotion Be Mindful of the Communication Channel Mediated Channels Email Instant Message SMS Message Is it appropriate to end a relationship via voicemail? What is the result of using CAPITAL LETTERS in an instant message or email? EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 14 Managing Difficult Emotions Facilitative and Debilitative Emotions

Facilitative Emotions Are emotions which contribute to effective functioning Debilitative Emotions Are emotions which detract from effective functioning Intensity Anger or irritation may be beneficial Rage usually makes matters worse EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 15 Managing Difficult Emotions Sources of Debilitative Emotions Our genetic makeup

Emotional memory Harmless events can trigger debilitative feelings Self-talk EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 16 Managing Difficult Emotions Self-Talk Interpretations people make of an event, during the process of self-talk that determine their feelings Event

Thought Feeling Being called names Ive done something wrong. hurt, upset Being called names My friend must be sick. concern, sympathy

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 17 Managing Difficult Emotions Irrational Thinking The Fallacies The Fallacy of Perfection The belief that a worthwhile communication should be able to handle every situation The Fallacy of Approval That it is vital to gain the approval of virtually every person EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING

18 Managing Difficult Emotions Irrational Thinking The Fallacy of Shoulds The inability to distinguish between what is and what should be The Fallacy of Overgeneralization Basing a decision on limited information When we exaggerate shortcomings The Fallacy of Causation The irrational belief that emotions are caused by others rather than by ones own self-talk EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING

19 Managing Difficult Emotions Irrational Thinking The Fallacy of Helplessness Satisfaction in life is determined by forces beyond your control The Fallacy of Catastrophic Expectations The assumption that if something bad can happen, then it is going to happen EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 20 Managing Difficult Emotions

Minimizing Debilitative Emotions Monitor your emotional reactions Note the activating event Record your self-talk Reappraise your irrational beliefs Replace self-defeating self-talk with more constructive thinking EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 21

Chapter Review What are Emotions? Influences on Emotional Expression Guidelines for Expressing Emotions Managing Difficult Emotions EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING 22

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